Are you a Dipper or a Dripper?

Two women stop by a coffee shop to purchase their daily cappuccino on their way to work.  The coffee shop is bustling with customers and orders.  They approach the counter and the clerk asks, “What do you want?”  The first woman says, “Good morning, I will have a double chocolate latte please”.   The clerk responds, “Is that it?”  The woman replies, “Yes that will do it for me thank you”.  The clerk replies, “That is two dollars and twenty-three cents.”  The woman digs through her purse struggling to find her wallet that was at one time right on top.  As she struggles, the clerk sighs and rolls her eyes.  The woman finds her wallet, which of course had fallen to the bottom of her purse.  The change purse portion has opened and her change has fallen to the bottom of the purse.  All the woman has in her wallet are two one-dollar bills and is now desperately trying to find the twenty-three cents at the bottom of her purse.  The clerk says with a snarl, “Can’t you see we are busy?  Most people would have had their money ready when they placed their order!”  The woman replies as she has just found a quarter at the bottom of her purse, “I am terribly sorry for the trouble, here is a quarter.”  The clerk rolls her eyes again and takes the money.  As the woman is waiting for her order, she manages to fish out a dollars worth of quarters to put in the tip jar.  As the two women leave, the second woman asks her the first woman, “Why were you so kind to that rude clerk?”  The first woman responds, “Why should I allow her to control how I react?”

I share this story with you in hopes that all of us will stop and think how we treat each other both in person, and now electronically.  I have been witness to many circumstances where people have just been downright rude and even mean spirited.   It seems it is becoming too common to be rude and negative on-line.  The internet as allowed us to disregard etiquette and basic good will toward human kind to go on a tirade just to hurt fellow human beings.  There seems to be a lack of desire to fully understand a situation and resolve it, the goal is revenge and what that person considers their just desserts.  We would never accept this behavior from our children, and often call it bullying.  It should be just as unacceptable for adults.

I am worried that there is an epidemic of negative human relations.   We have far too many reality shows that sensationalize outlandish, mean spirited, and rude behavior.  What happened to being kind?  This negativity is like a cancer that multiplies out of control until we are terminally pessimistic.  It is lethal to us not only emotionally but also physically.  The stress we put on our bodies and the victims of our behavior causes emotional and physical health problems.  Stop and think that your victim could be going through a life crisis and you have just severed their lifeline.  We are appalled and concerned that children are committing suicide due to bullying.  Why are we not living by example?  Adults can just as easily succumb to maltreatment just as much as a child.

My analogy is this.  We are all carrying around a bucket that holds our self worth.  As we live our lives and interact with people, the levels of our self worth rise and fall.  We have those individuals who “dip” into our bucket and take our self worth, and then there are those who “drip” self worth into our buckets.

The “dippers” are like parasites.  They feed off our self worth so they can selfishly feed their own.  The problem is the “stolen” self worth is not as filling as self worth honorably earned.  They must seek out and steal more just to survive.  They are never genuinely satisfied and this only intensifies their hunger.

Then you have the “drippers”.  These people respect and love the human spirit.  They have vaccinated themselves against the negative cancer.  Their buckets are always full and they share their wealth of self worth with others.  The more they share and “drip” into others buckets, the fuller their buckets get.  They must drip more and more into other buckets so their bucket do not overflow. 

I do not know about you, but I would much rather have an epidemic of compassion than negativity.  So I ask you, are you a “dipper” or a “dripper”? 

Be sweet and drip,

Mel